Dr. Danesh D. Chinoy is a leading Health and Wellness Coach, Sports Physiotherapist and Psychologist. He is dedicated to helping all to heal holistically and remain fighting fit for life with his over two-decades’ rich expertise which has won him innumerable awards, nationally and globally. Connect with Dr. Chinoy at: firstname.lastname@example.org
The founder of the modern Self-help Movement – Louise Hay, who died aged 90 – inspired such devotion that her clients regarded her a ‘living saint’. She treated emotional problems and alleviated physical illnesses with the power of love and positive thinking. Her groundbreaking book, ‘You Can Heal Your Life’ (1984) has sold over sixty million copies. With millions swearing by its teachings, this New Year, let me extract and share with you the best of its wisdom, which has changed and healed the lives of so many.
Hay advocates a holistic approach to nurture and nourish your entire being. This includes your Body (through nutrition and exercise); your Mind (through visualization, affirmations, healing workshops, etc.) and your Soul (through prayer, meditation, practicing forgiveness and unconditional love, etc.).
How we think and speak leads to our body’s “eases” and “dis-eases”. We create (dis)ease in our body with our thought patterns. Essentially, patterns of thought (relating to resentment, criticism, guilt and fear) are the main contributors to our illnesses. Forgiveness and releasing these thought patterns (alongside healthy nutrition and care for our body) are the essentials to healing. It’s crucial to do so as our thoughts create our world – and our physical state, too. Long-held resentments eat away at the body. Most disease comes from a state of unforgiving. Whenever we are ill, we need to search our hearts to see whom we need to forgive.
Forgiveness means letting go. It has nothing to do with condoning behaviour. We do not need to know how to forgive; we just need to be willing to forgive… the Universe will take care of the how.
Try this exercise: Sit down quietly with your eyes closed and say, “The person I need to forgive is (say their name) and I forgive you for (what they’ve done.” Do this repeatedly – imagine the person you’re forgiving say, ‘Thank you, I set you free now.’ Practice this visualization daily for just 5 minutes. Search your heart for injustices and grudges you still carry. Then let them go. Turn your attention to yourself. Say out loud, “I forgive myself for (what you’ve done).” Do this for another 5 minutes. While some experiences are easy to let go, some we need to chip away at, until one day they dissolve. If you’re unable to do this yourself, reach out for help from a wellness coach like yours truly.
As you forgive, you must also learn to love yourself. Then love, health, happiness and success will flow your way. Loving yourself creates organisation in your mind, happier relationships in your life, fulfilling jobs and it even enables your body weight to normalise. Do not confuse love for vanity or arrogance because these emanate from fear. Self-love grows from self-respect and gratitude for the miracle of our body and mind.
Try this exercise: Look into your own eyes in a mirror, say “your name”, followed by “I love and accept you exactly as you are.” Seems easy? Try it! Some cry, some get angry, some belittle their features, some insist they can’t do it. With practice, you will start appreciating and acknowledging your true self.
Healing requires us to release the pattern of thoughts that has led to our present condition. The ‘problem’ is rarely the real problem – it’s the symptom. Superficial things we dislike about ourselves mask a deeper belief that we are ‘not good enough’. Genuine self-love (not narcissism) is the basis of all self-healing.
What you place your attention on, will grow. Hence, move away from negative self-talk like “I don’t want to be fat”, “I don’t want to be unhappy”; Instead, focus on what you have or do – “I am healthy”, “I am happy, joyous and free.” Learn to think in positive affirmations as a habit, using the present tense – eg. “I am”, “I have”. Remember – you are the power in your world. You get to have whatever you choose to think.
When we are growing up, we tend to recreate the emotional environment of our early home life. We also recreate in our personal relationships those we had with our parents, or what they had between them. Think how often you have had a lover or a boss who was ‘just like’ your mom or dad.
We treat ourselves as our parents treated us. We scold and punish ourselves in the same way – “You never do anything right,” or “It’s all your fault.” How often have you said these to yourself? Then again, we can similarly also love and encourage ourselves as we were loved and encouraged as children – “You are wonderful,” or “I love you.” How often do you tell yourself these? Let’s at least tell these more often to our kids.
Realise that the past has no power. It doesn’t matter how long we’ve had a negative pattern. The power is in the present moment. What a wonderful thing to realise! We can be free from negativity this very moment on!
Sometimes, a bit of ‘physical letting go’ helps! Experiences and emotions can get locked in the body. Screaming in the car with all the windows rolled up can be very liberating. Beating the bed or kicking your pillows helps release anger.
Learn to think in positive affirmations, spoken in the present. Affirmations are statements we make. Often, we think in negative affirmations, which only generate more negativity. Always make positive statements about how you want your life to be and speak in the present tense, such as ‘I am’ or ‘I have’. Your subconscious mind is an obedient servant – if you declare something in the future tense, that’s where the idea will always stay – just out of your reach and in the future.
The webs we create around ourselves need to be unwound. If you have ever untangled a ball of string, you know that yanking and pulling only makes it worse. You need to gently unravel the knots. Likewise, be patient with yourself as you untangle your own mental knots. The willingness to let go of the old is the master-key.
Wishing all my dear PT Readers a very happy New Year filled with love, joy, happiness and all that is good. Ushta Te!