Cyrus The (Not So) Great!

Aapro Cyrus Broacha, the Brand Ambassador of Humour, is back to unleash his hilarious take on ……… in our exclusive column, ‘Cyrus The (Not So) Great’!

The Million Dollar Question!!!

Just a reminder… it is now the festive occasion of Jamshedji Navroz! So, can Behroze, Diana, and Simone stop wishing me Happy Happy Women’s Day!!! Oh, and Arnavaaz aunty, please stop wishing me International Women’s Day. I’m still coping with Women’s Day on a national level first!! In fact, even on a local district level.

The question that I put forth to you dear readers, on this auspicious occasion of Navroz, is indeed a controversial one. So, for those who want to avoid controversy, please don’t read this article. Also, those who want (a) Peace of mind; (b) Rest and relaxation; and (c) Intellectual stimulation, please don’t read this article!

Now that our disclaimers are all in place, let’s address the elephant in the room. And by that I don’t mean Yezdi uncle. I mean, we’ve all packed away the pounds in the pandemic, so let’s leave poor Yezdi uncle alone. Truth be told, I’m feeling shy to reveal all…. I don’t want us Parsis to start fighting, and especially not on Jamshedi Navroz! We already have Russia and Ukraine, Kangana and Deepika, Yogi and Akhilesh, Behram and Anyone who encroaches on his parking space… so let’s be careful. No, let’s be very, very careful.

Okay, now before I reveal the controversy, I’m putting off all the lights, so I can’t be seen. I don’t want the finger of suspicion to point to me. Again, I’m only doing this under duress. I’m being forced into it. It’s not on my own free will. But it’s Jamshedi Navroz, so we all need to start with a clean state, whether its Punjab, Goa, Manipur, UP or Parsis. The clean state starts now… Is everyone ready?

Okay then, let’s begin. Okay – one more thing before we start, after the revelation, please don’t send letters of objection. And if you must, please don’t use American spellings. Okay, enough said, let’s go. After I have a glass of water, room temperature…

So, what is the elephant in the room? This huge controversy, that may split the Parsi community clean in half? It is the revival of ‘Aleti Paleti’. Should this traditional dish be brought back into the limelight, or consigned to the dust bin, of those ‘has-been’ dishes forever?

I told you, it was huge. You are all gobsmacked, perhaps. Did not think a day would come when you’d have to make such a sensitive and controversial decision, right? Well, it has. And on this the most auspicious of days, even as you chew on your Malai-na-khaja, spare a thought, and don’t be faint hearted. The world needs an answer. All those in favour of Aleti Paleti, send in your support to our Editor in Chief. Oh, and yes, please spell correctly!

Jamshedi Navroz Muburak to all!!

Cyrus Broacha
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