Every February 14, humanity stages its annual drama. Restaurants fill up, roses double in price, and social media suddenly becomes a poetry competition. Somewhere in the middle of all this enthusiasm stands the average Bawaji, calculating traffic time, menu options and whether 9 pm is an acceptable hour to be awake.

Let’s be honest. We are a community that believes in love, but we prefer it served with sincerity rather than spectacle – more practical, digestible and preferably served with dessert. This quiz is for our dear Bawas and Bawis who love deeply and who will share the last piece of custard but hesitate before buying a heart-shaped cushion. Whether you resemble aapro Bubbling-Behram who plans every detail or aapri Tranquil-Tehmi who observes from a safe distance, here’s your chance to discover more about your romantic personality. So, take a deep breath, answer honestly, laugh generously, and prepare to find out the important truth: Are you truly Valentine’s Day Material?

1. Your ideal Valentine’s gift is:
   A. Something useful. Possibly with warranty
   B. Food. Always food.
   C. Anything returnable or refundable.
2. When someone says, “Let’s do something special for Valentine’s,” you:
   A. Say yes, then immediately regret it
   B. Ask for full details, location, menu and parking situation before emotionally committing.
   C. Reply, “Arre, every day is special, why extra pressure today?”
3. Valentine’s Day on a weekday means:
   A. Stress plus deadlines plus romance expectations.
   B. Thank God, the perfect excuse to avoid plans!
   C. Sleep deprivation and resentment.
4. Public displays of affection make you feel:
   A. Slightly embarrassed on behalf of everyone within a 10-metre radius.
   B. Like offering unsolicited life advice to complete strangers.
   C. Grateful that Parsis traditionally express love through feeding, not choreography.
5. If love had a language in your house, it would be:
   A. Food portions
   B. Worry disguised as nagging
   C. Checking your bank balance and blood pressure in the same conversation.
6. If Cupid visited a Parsi baug, he would be:
   A. Questioned by three aunties about family background
   B. Asked to furnish his shooting license before he reached for any arrows.
   C. Advised, “Nice costume, but have you considered a real job?”
7. Your version of saying “I love you” sounds like:
   A. “Have you eaten properly?” asked thrice, followed by a food parcel anyway.
   B. “Message me when you reach,” because anxiety is the purest form of romance.
   C. “I checked the bill already,” the ultimate gesture of trust.
8. Your Valentine’s Day outfit planning involves:
   A. Trying on three ‘good’ outfits and finally wearing the same trusted one worn in cousin Xerxes’ wedding in 2018.
   B. Wearing perfume like it’s an armour against crowded restaurants.
   C. Asking for the final approval from ‘Mumma’, who adjusts your collar and your life choices, simultaneously.
9. You are gifted a giant teddy-bear for Valentine’s Day. You:
   A. Wonder where to store this emotional furniture
   B. Ask if the bill is refundable
   C. Give it to your maid’s child within 24 hours
10. Your Mumma does not approve of your date for Valentine’s Day. You:
    A. Immediately begin listing the person’s qualifications, family background and eating habits.
    B. Downplay everything to ‘We are just friends’, temporarily.
    C. Cancel your plans, realising approval may take three financial quarters.
11. Your mother-in-law casually asks, “So what are your Valentine’s Day plans?” You:
    A. Provide a detailed itinerary because you sense judgment happening.
    B. Invite her as well to neutralise tension.
    C. Ask your partner to respond because diplomacy is teamwork.
12. Your partner asks, “Am I romantic?” You reply:
    A. “You are… dependable,” with great tact and careful eye contact.
    B. You waited till I started eating. That is peak romance!”
    C. “The Government really ought to do more to control the pollution levels!”

RESULTS:

Mostly A’s – The Practical Parsi Romantic: You believe in love, but only after confirming the menu, parking and portion sizes. You may not write poetry, but you will ensure everyone eats, reaches home safely and remembers to carry a sweater. Your version of romance is dependable, thoughtful and slightly over-prepared. People feel safe around you, even if they occasionally wish you would relax and stop analysing dessert options like a financial investment.

Mostly B’s – The Emotionally Alert Bawa: You enjoy the idea of romance, provided it comes with structure, humour and an exit strategy. You love deeply, worry loudly and express affection through concern disguised as sarcasm. You are the person who says, “Eat first, then talk,” which is honestly the most stable foundation any relationship can have.

Mostly C’s – The Legendary Anti-Drama Champion: You have achieved peak Parsi evolution. Valentine’s Day does not intimidate you. You approach love with dry humour, sharp observation and a refusal to be emotionally manipulated by heart-shaped décor. You may appear unromantic, but secretly you are loyal, grounded and impossible to replace once someone understands your language of care.

So, whether you are a Bubbling-Behram or a Tranquil-Tehmi, remember this: romance in our community may come with traffic discussions, parental supervision and at least one lecture on digestion, but it also comes with loyalty, laughter and the kind of warmth that no grand gesture can replace. And perhaps the truest Valentine’s promise we can make is to keep romance simple, laughter loud and dessert orders non-negotiable! Happy Valentine’s Day!