Meherbai and Meherwanji were in their fifty-sixth year of marriage, which was full of ups and downs – high highs and low lows. Meherbai got married at twenty-one and had her fair share of ups and downs too. But she constantly worked on improving her marriage and told Meherwanji that they should spend the remaining time in joy, happiness and gratitude.
Meherbai: Darling, bohot gayi aur thodi rahi. Lots of years have gone and few remain – let’s spend every moment being happy.
Meherwanji: Yesss!! Don’t go to the kitchen today. I’ll cook lunch for us.
Meherbai: But sweetheart, you don’t know how to break open an egg! Forget eedu, you can’t even make a decent cup of tea after all this time!
Meherwanji: Now that’s entirely your fault for spoiling me by giving me everything haath ma ney haath ma!
Meherbai: Ok – ok! Chibavla chakla na thai jao. Let’s eat out today.
Meherwanji: Taj Hotel or a Rasta nu Bhel?
This couple could grab happiness out of every moment – immaterial of whether they were fine-dining at Taj or wolfing down a roadside-bhel.
Meherbai: Neither! Let’s do a subway nu sandwich – today is our cheat-day, so we can indulge. Eat, drink and be merry for tomorrow, we diet!
Meherwanji dressed up nattily. In fact, so nattily, that Meherbai quipped, “Lalya na lagan ma nathi javanu! Subway ma sandwich khavanu chhe! Ok?
Meherwanji: Okee-dokee! I’ll take off my jazzy gladrags and put on something un-jazzy.
Off they went, just the two of them, all lovey-dovey, on a date. Lovey dovey because after 50 years, in all marriages, love becomes a deeper love when all you want is to make your spouse happy! As lady-luck would have it, the first Subway had closed down due to COVID, so they drove all over town doing Mumbai Darshan and at a long last, found one that was open. But hai re kismat, there was no parking there. So Meherwanji parked the car far away saying, “You sit in the car, I’ll get the subs for both of us.”
Meherwanji: Mahri Jaan, what filling would you prefer?
Meherbai: Chicken – not Indian, Continental style.
Meherwanji: Pao kevu? What sort of bread?
Meherbai: Only multigrain. Not unhealthy safed, maida na doocha! And no jalepenos or onions. Lots of lettuce. I love my greens. Arrey Ha – only toasted, not grilled.
Meherwanji: Toasted and Grilled is the same thing.
Meherbai: Jarak bi nahi. Toasted is before making the sandwich and grilled is after making the sandwich. Also remember, NO mustard and no Mayo. Now repeat everything, or you’ll forget and bring me something Ugram-bugram! Meherwanji forgot half the things, so Meherbai told him to take dictation (like a secretary) and write everything word for word.
Meherwanji: But dearest, with no onions, jalepenos, only toasted, with boiled chicken, no mayo, no mustard? It will be tasteless. Only bread, chicken and lettuce na patra!
Meherbai: Tamune nathi khavaano! I am trying to eat healthy and cut calories. You want me to be slim and trim, no? Then just go and get my sub as per MY list.
Off went the well-trained hubby to get a sub as per the wife’s tapko of innumerable instructions.
The Subway Guy: Both same to same, sir?
Meherwanji: Arrey nahi re! Make one regular sub for me. Put in everything to make it tasty. I like my normal regular sub. Havn’t had one in ages, so I’ll enjoy every bite of it today.
Meherwanji brought to two subs to the car. One regular and the other as per Memsaab’s instructions of ‘No this and No that’. Both sat in the car, opened the wrapper, said ‘Cheers’ and took the first bite.
Meherwanji: Superb! Very tasty. Majha avi gayi!
Meherbai: Yuck!! I don’t like my sub. Give me one bite of yours so I can compare the two subs.
The Mrs. took a bite from her mister’s subway and said, “Ha, kharekhar, it’s delicious. I’ll have your sub and you can have mine. Chalo exchange karo. Meherwanji took one bite of Meherbai’s insipid sub and said, “Darling, mine is not multigrain bread.”
Meherbai: Today, I’ll settle for white bread.
Meherwanji: Mine is not chicken or continental chicken – It’s Tandoori chicken.
Meherbai: I like it.
Meherwanji: There are a lot of jalepenos and onions, which you don’t like.
Meherbai: Will do.
Meherwanji: There’s no lettuce which you so love. Further, it’s grilled – you like toasted!
Meherbai: Manjan na karo – toasted or grilled, su farak parej?
Meherwanji: Darling, you yourself said that toasted is before making the sandwich and grilled is after making the sandwich.
Meherbai: So what? Boli tey gunah kidho?
Meherwanji: There’s lots mustard and mayo which you didn’t want.
Meherbai: When I gave you the order, I didn’t want. But now, I want.
And so it came to pass that the wife ate the regular, normal, tasty sub while her better or bitter-half had the abnormal, insipid one.
Meherbai: Now get coffees for us to wash down the subs. I want only slim-milk, only brown sugar and medium -not too milky and not too dark.
Meherwanji: I am not walking in the mid-day sun again. Mahru blood pressure vadhi-jasey. We’ll go home and I’ll make you a black-coffee which will be dark like the night, hot like hell and sweet like my love for you. (Actually, black coffee was the only thing he knew how to make.)
And there hangs today’s episode of this loving and loveable couple!!